You know you're in trouble when...

harkerii@ix.netcom.com (John Edwards)

• The kender says 'Oops!'

  jmhamari@mtu.edu (Jason M. Hamari)

  Actually, you know you're in trouble when you have a kender in the party in the first place!

• The party's fighter turns to you and says "I've really f***ed up this time. Let's get out of here, NOW!"

jimbo@gwis2.circ.gwu.edu (James Joseph Cook)

• Anytime you hear a little "snick" sound when a lock is being picked.
• Your faithful dog puts tail between legs and runs like the devil in the direction opposite your own.
• There is a guy who keeps foloowing your party. he wears black robes, carrys a scythe or scikle (obviously some sort of alfalfa farmer, right?), and is highly ossified.
• You here the words "uh, guys, did one of you cast an illusion of a horde of ravening orcs, by any chance?"

Mike DeRosenroll

• You know you're in trouble when an evil wizard nails you with a fireball and the DM asks to borrow all your sixed-sided dice for a minute.

  dubois@news.oswego.edu (Jeffery Ray Dubois )

  And the DM usually plays Shadowrun(a D6 based game and anyone who plays has hord of em.).

  harvey@gwis2.circ.gwu.edu (Bradley Smith)

  I actually had that happen to me, except it was d4s, and the only one effected was me. Of course, I survived, as I knew I would, because, being at 4th level, I had _yet_ to roll below an 8 for my hit points. Add in my con bonus, and it seems like a good risk to take for a 54hp dwarven fighter...

• You know you're in trouble the party wizard says: "Don't worry guys, we're just outside the blast radius. Oh wait a minute, the radius was in yards?"
• You know you're in trouble when the party wizard reaches fifth-level and gets fireball.

Guardian@cris.com (Lone_Wolf)

• The party's mage stops spellcasting and says, "Ooops."
• Your character is blind, deaf, naked, stunned, suspended over a pit filled with acid and poisoned spikes, has 3 hit points left to his name --- and the DM *still* isn't smiling.
• You find yourself confronted with a goblin who pulls out two Unholy Reavers - one for each hand.
• The local guide *insists* this route is perfectly safe... but wants your party to go first.
• The paladin your party has been trying to rescue for the last month has these cute little fangs and those adorable, shiny horns...
• You pick up the faintly magical sword and hear a voice that says, "Do you know any gods?"
• You come eyeball to eyeball with some critter. You blink once. It blinks *nine* times.
• Everyone else in the party is running away from the dragon faster than you are.

mjg@GAS.UUG.Arizona.EDU (Michael J Gelsey)

• The DM says. "your fireball fails to affect the monster."
• The DM says, "You fail to dispel the polymorphy spell placed on the paladin."
• The dragon says, "I don't believe you."
• You find a mindflayer.
• The psychotic evil cleric witha gate spell on a scroll says, "Prepare to be judged."

eglamkow@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Ed Glamkowski)

• some old guy with a crumpled hat and mousy gray robes stumbles around muttering "How did that spell go...."

  lucifer@infernal.demon.co.uk Lucifer

  You're in _real_ trouble when he says: "Oh yes, I remember..."

mehawk@PEAK.ORG (Michael Sandy)

• You start meeting a lot of gods and representatives of gods who say you are the Chosen one for defeating a major evil dude...
• You know you are _really_ in trouble when they die horribly after telling you this.
• Did I mention this happens at 5th bloody level?
• Alternately, the GM goes on at length about how powerful certain creatures are in his campaign, and when the characters meet them, they are deathly afraid of some place where the adventurers have been _Quested_ to go.
• Ob history of a character: Erica Saddleborn, started campaigning at 2nd level Cleric of Hermes, 2nd level magic user. First day of campaigning, an innkeeper turns out to be a Type I demon in disguise. By luck and superior allies it decides to leave after taking half its hitpoints, leaving behind a major potence amulet that got sliced off its neck by a PC.
• An NPC wizard tries to analyze it and accidently summons Kostchtchie! The gamemaster turned to the 'D' section of the monster manual and showed us its face. It blew up the wizards head, and left, but before it left it threatened our lives in graphic and terrifying detail. 2nd level and my cleric has a major powers emnity.
• _However_. My character has a brainstorm, this amulet can force the summoning of a particular major demon, and the nation we are in is at war with orcs backed by an order of demon summonning black wizards. Why not deprive them of an ally?
• My plan was to summon the demon and _drown_ it with holy water. I figured 200 flasks ought to do it. The game master vetoed it. *sigh*. I didn't consider my plan abusive at all. He said that holy water wouldn't kill a demon, then that I wouldn't be able to get enough holy water.
• Later in the campaign my character indeed _did_ kill a demon with holy water.
• Oh well. Now that the demon backed forces have conquered most of my character's homeland, killed her foster family and devoured the soul of her former teachers she is looking for the power necessary to invade and conquer the planes of the Abyss, (long term goal), as well as develop mundane weapons capable of penetrating high level wizard defenses. Hey, when the GM sicks demons on you at 2nd level, by 9th you start to get upset with them.
• The whole campaign crisis happened when some power, Loki or Tiamat, decided to go on a major plane conquering crusade. My character figures that if they have a base which their mages can strike from and retreat to they'll never be rid of them, so she has Quested herself with the task of purging the black mages from the multiverse. Her motto: "Live fast, die young, and leave a blast crater where a greater demon used to be!"

mlmorr0@pop.uky.edu The Marvelous Magnificent Michael Morris the Manically Mad

• The DM smiles evilly...
• The 1st level wild mage says "Magic, do as you will" (Nahal's Reckless Dweomer.)
• The mage pulls out a ball of bat guano and sulfur .... In a 10' x 10' x 10' room.